ENFPs -
From Conversations with Discoverer Advocates

The following is adapted from Linda V. Berens and Dario Nardi, The 16 Personality Types: Descriptions for Self-Discovery (Telos Publications, 1999) *Used with permission.

What's it like to be you?

I have to be directly in contact with people and know that somehow I am influencing what happens for them in a positive way. That is a kind of driving force in my life, actualizing potential, giving encouragement, letting people know what I think they can do. I have been told I have this uncanny ability to absolutely zero in on and intuit what people need. I sometimes recognize something about them that they have not said to anybody else. And they say, "How did you know?"

I see myself as a facilitator. It's not about imposing what I want to see happen, although I have some grand ideal of everyone having a better life or feeling better or dealing with a particular issue. Being able to understand people in depth gives me a feeling I have been friends with them forever, and when I act too much that way, they may not be able to handle it. But I feel sad when I see potential in someone and they are either denying it or not able to access it in some way. I'm very sensitive too, but sometimes easily discouraged, and I still go on thrilled to meet new people, with an interest in assisting them in whatever they are seeking. I give them both knowledge and meaning. I bring a fresh perspective and my appreciation for people's goodness.

If I'm stuck for hours working at a monotonous task, I get peculiar, zonky, and weird. I get very tired if I can't get out and exchange information. I'll lack bounce, the bubbling of ideas that makes me run through life. I absolutely have to have a fulfilling job or I get depressed. I want to use my talents, make a difference, and have autonomy. If not, I struggle to retain a sense of self and it's like my spirit is dying.

People talk about being drawn to me. Friends are so important to me and I have good intentions. I like to think I'll do whatever I can do to hold on to them, but often I don't get around to writing or calling. They know that if they create a friendship with me, then the friendship is going to be intense and loyal and I will be there for them when they really need me. And I can engage with people that I care about who are a distance away and feel like they are a part of my life on an ongoing basis, picking up a lot of feeling from what they write or when they call. It would be easier to spin straw into gold than be totally alone...

I remember this wonderful little boy, but he was conning everyone. I kept looking straight at him, "in the soul," and finally he put his hands up over his eyes and said, "You've got to quit looking at me like that. I can look at people like that, but you can't look at me like that." And I completely understood him and I said, "I know who you are, and it's not bad. It's good, you're good, and you have promise." That's what people don't want to hear-I see you, I value you, I care what you'll become, and I wish to be a part of that if you need me.